Side Note:

Side Note:
For those who haven't figured it out, or haven't been here: The titles of most of the blogs here are song lyrics. If you google them, it should take you to the song and the song is good to listen to before, during, or after reading to help set the tone of the blog. I find music to be very cohesive with reading and writing.

Sunday, January 13, 2013

You Can't Stop the Feeling and There's No Reason, Let's Make the Call and Take It All Again...

I have spent my life being a back up plan. A second choice. I have always been the girl who was amazing to be friends with, but not attractive enough to date. So my friends would chase the hot girl, sometimes catch her, and then when she would drag their heart through the mud I was still the one they'd lean on and I'd be right there to help them through it.
I had no ulterior motive, just a heart that pours out to those who seek love and don't receive it back as eagerly as they give it out. I know what that is like, and so I empathized and tried to provide solace and caring for them. I'd give advice when asked and be the best friend I could be to anyone.
And in far too many cases, after they'd been chewed up and spit out, they'd come back in their emotionally vulnerable state and suddenly I was good enough to show the attention to. Suddenly me not being the 10 didn't matter as much because I was a human being and didn't abuse them as she had. I was a decent plan B when plan A fell through.
...And I was supposed to be flattered by that, apparently.
Why should I be flattered to be a second choice?  Why should my heart be set a-flutter by the fact that someone thinks it's alright to settle on me?
I'm not to be settled for. I will never be a second choice. A back up. A plan B.
If I am not good enough to be the one someone works for, then I'm not going to be good enough to stand by when things get tough.
I may not be the 10 in the miniskirt, but I'm happy over hear in my own skin being the best person I can be and that person, for someone, is THE plan. No back ups necessary.


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