The Real Real Housewives...

We get such a bad rep, we really do. And to be honest, when you think of the extremes of what a lot of army wives have done, you can't really blame people for assuming things about us. But I do. We are not all the same. We do not all spend crazy amounts of money while our husbands are gone. We do not all sit around eating bon-bons. Most of the wives I know work or have worked or, like myself, their husbands like the time together with their wives not working.
Before Erik and I were ever married we talked about working and educations and all these things. Erik wasn't in the army when we met or got married, as anyone who has read my first few blogs will know. That decision came after. But even before the military was a part of our lives, we knew that at some point when we could afford it financially we would be careful not to over-extend ourselves financially so that Erik could work and I could stay home and clean and pay bills do the shopping and the cooking. This way, in addition, when we had kids I wouldn't go from working full time to being home full-time, I'd already be used to it. This is something we both want and it works for us. Does it work for everyone? No. Does everyone want it to work for them? No. But why is our choice for me to stay at home so wrong to so many of you? Is it because you're a women's liberator who wants to come liberate me and burn my bra? No thanks. Not unless you intend to come carry my boobs around for me all day so my back doesn't kill me.
Is it because you want to do the same but can't? I learned in economics in high school how to function as a family on one income. Then, at eighteen, a boss I had when I worked for a certain orange cell phone company as customer service told me that he and his wife were the same way and wanted the same things and had been living successfully with four children on one income their entire marriage because they did not buy things they could not afford and limited themselves to one credit card for emergencies only. Even then they only used it if they did not have what they needed in savings to cover the emergency. That's right. They had a savings account on one income too. It isn't hard. You just have to be careful.
My parents raised seven children on one income and they weren't rich by far or "livin' it up" but they got by and did just fine.
My best friend and her husband manage it just like we do. She used to work full time and the extra money was great I'm sure, but I bet it's even better being able to be home and watch their first child grow up and know he's not stuck in some day care all day every day.
My husband is my best friend and I am his. I love him and I care for him. He adores the fact that each day I make him breakfast on his hygiene hour, lunch on his lunch break and dinner when he is home. Between those times, I clean our house, I budget, I run errands. I make him proud of me just like I am proud of him.
I may not get a paycheck but I have a job, and it is one I wouldn't trade for the world.

<3s

Fae